Five Must Haves for an Unmedicated Labor

When I became pregnant with Logan, I knew I wanted to attempt unmedicated vaginal birth. It is more beneficial for the baby and mother to have minimal medical interventions, from what I read. But also, I wanted to prove to myself I could do it. While I haven't shared Logan's birth story yet, I'll give you a spoiler. Logan was delivered via an emergency cesarean section. BUT, that was after hours and hours of unmedicated labor. I made it to 9cm dilated. I was so close to the pushing stage and then like a good book… Plot Twist. And even though Logan’s birth didn’t end as I hoped, I got as far as I could on my own. I wouldn’t have made it as far as I did, however, without the five items listed below.

Before I count down my top five, I do have some honorable mentions. These items didn’t necessarily help get to me 9cm, but they did come in handy throughout labor and during recovery.

• A front zip sports bra. I can't remember where I heard about this one; a birth podcast or a labor and delivery youtube video, maybe, but having a zip-front sports bra made skin to skin much easier. A quick unzip and the baby can be placed on your chest. No worries about pulling a bra over your head or having someone unhook it from the back.

• A locking water bottle. I had mine in bed with me all night before active labor started and then during recovery when I was sore and it was hard to move. Not once did I worry about it leaking.

• A long phone charging cord. This item is on every mom's must-have list, and for a good reason. Hospital beds are made to be moved, so they are not snug up against a wall with an outlet super close. The one I purchased was 10 foot long and it was perfect.

• Items for your support partners: an extra pillow and blanket, comfy warm pants and a hoodie, and snacks. The nurses and doctors are there to care for you and your baby, not for your support person. Make sure they bring some essentials from home so they can get some rest, not freeze their bums off, and stay energized. If your lucky, your labor won't be too long, but it could also be days if you factor in recovery time.

Okay, now on to the good stuff. Here are the five items that got me through hours of unmedicated labor:

5. Crocs and Socks Anyone?

I know Crocs aren't for everyone, but they were one of the best items I brought to the hospital. I wore them not only during labor, but also during recovery in the hospital. I labored on my feet most of the time, and was even in the shower at one point. Crocs, while not very fashionable, are supportive, comfortable, and won't slip on wet surfaces like showers. I also wore them with warm thick socks when I traveled down to the NICU to see Logan. I wasn't worried about showcasing the latest foot fashions during our hospital stay. If you are, then Crocs may not be for you. But I'm keeping them on my must-haves list. Side note: I got tons of compliments from the nurses about my Crocs.

4. Stay Focused with Noise-canceling Earbuds

With noise-canceling earbuds, I was able to sleep better the night before active labor started. I had my white noise app on and could drown out the monitors' sounds and commotion from the hallway. Once I was in active labor, my earbuds were great for blocking everyone out and focusing on what my body needed to do.

3. Zone Out with playlists of music, meditations and calming sounds

I made labor playlists weeks in advance on Spotify. One playlist had upbeat, fun songs for the start of labor. You know, before contractions became fast and furious, and shit got real. Imagine college pre-gaming, getting ready with your girls type songs. The second playlist was calmer, more acoustic, and zen. Think coffee house or brunch cafe vibes. I also had a few meditations focused on pain management saved from my Calm app. Both my playlists and my meditations helped keep me in a great headspace to make it as far as I did.

2. have a mantra or affirmation and Put it on Repeat

I know it sounds very woo woo to say this is a must-have, but you don't know unless you know. And since I've been through unmedicated labor. I know! My mantra was "pain equals progress," and I repeated those three words in my head over and over and over and over and over again during my contractions.

1. Enlist a Professional by hiring a doula

By far, the MVP of my labor was my doula. Not only did she provide physical support during labor through counter-pressure and massages, but she also talked me through options for being admitted to the hospital vs. staying at home before active labor. She advocated for my birth preferences when my doctor suggested a cesarean section by asking if there was an alternative option and how much time we had before deciding. And during the c-section, she was in the operating room. She took photos of Logan while he was being cleaned up, weighed, and assessed. My doula captured his first minutes of life. She then waited around until we were all safely back in our recovery room.

Our doula checked in on us a few days post-delivery and had a final meeting with us a few weeks after we came home from the hospital. She brought over a small notebook where she wrote down the details of that day, Logan's birth story. I didn't have to piece together snippets of memories from the most special day of my life. I had them written down as fact for me to read whenever I wanted.

Doulas are an added expense, and their fees can range from a few hundred dollars to a couple of thousand dollars, depending on geographic location and their experience. But having my doula by my side during labor was worth every penny!

mamas, What were your mvps of labor?

Celebrating World Down Syndrome Day by Sharing Our Diagnosis Story

Well, this post is LOOONNNGGG overdue, considering my son is now nine months old! I had every intention of writing this post last Spring after I had time to process all my feelings, but then COVID happened. And then Logan was born. And then I went back to work. And then it was the holidays. You get the picture. So I'm here now, on World Down Syndrome Day, to share our diagnosis story and journey thus far.

My husband and I tried to conceive for over a year before getting pregnant with Logan. We had a previous miscarriage before our eight-week ultrasound, so when we made it to ten weeks and the point when they do prenatal genetics testing, we were beyond excited. We knew there was a chance of a genetic disorder due to my age but didn't consider it much. We just wanted to know the gender so we could start planning.

I received a call from my doctor's office the Friday before Christmas. It was a nurse from my OB's office with the results of our prenatal testing..."89% chance of having Trisomy 21" was all I heard. I sat and cried while the life I dreamt up of our family was being erased one image at a time in slow motion: vacations to the beach, birthday parties, first-year milestones of rolling, crawling, walking and first words, playing with cousins, the moody teenage years, first dances, graduations, weddings, grandkids. My heart broke as every image flashed in my mind. And now I had to go home and break the news to my husband.

I knew how my husband felt about having a child with special needs. I was crushed to be the one to cause him so much pain. While the details of that conversation are very much a blur, I remember lots of crying, sitting in silence, staring, and more crying. We told our families over text messages because we couldn't bear to say the words out loud. We ditched our gender reveal plans and backed out of our usual Christmas events. We just wanted/needed to grieve.

We thought if we proceeded with this pregnancy, our child would need care into his adult life. There would be a high chance he would have medical issues and need painful surgeries. His intelligence would never be more than that of a seven-year-old. He would have speech impairments if he could even speak at all. He wouldn't even look like us. And more than anything, we were devastated about how our child might be viewed by our friends, other parents, other children, and the world. These assumptions were all wrong, but at the time, those were our fears.

My husband and I were at odds on how to proceed. If I got my way, would he resent me? If he got his way would I resent him? Both options seemed like it would end in divorce. It felt like our world was crumbling. We were in a pretty dark place for a few weeks. There were tears every day. We pleaded with each other, tried to strike deals, tried using research and facts to change the other one’s mind. We were painfully honest and vulnerable with each other. And at times, it didn't seem like our marriage would survive. But somehow, we came out the other side, and after confirming the diagnosis through amniocentesis, we were ready to move forward with the pregnancy one day at a time.

My pregnancy was so different than I imagined it would be. It was harder to celebrate the milestones, the first kicks, a growing belly, decorating his nursery, while not knowing what the future would hold. During every ultrasound, I held my breath, praying for a good report. And then I had to see the faces of pity and caution when the ultrasound tech and doctor would remind me my child had Down syndrome like I didn't already know.

I not only had to research how to care for a newborn, how to care for myself after delivery, and what labor would be like, but I also had to research what to expect when caring for a child with Down syndrome. I had this weight on my shoulders to be the one with all the knowledge. I guess that was the mother in me coming out. I had to educate my husband and our family members to be prepared for his arrival. What might his limitations be? What health issues might he have? What were the best products and toys for his development? What bathtub, car seat, and high chair were best for a baby with low muscle tone?

I wanted to be super prepared and educated and know all the possible issues so I wouldn't be caught off guard like I was with his diagnosis. Doing the research helped me cope. It helped me feel strong enough to bear the weight of all the decisions, the fears, and the disappointments.

Now that Logan is here, I can say with 100% certainty that our world is better with him in it. I had no clue what unconditional love was until I held him in my arms. The moment I met my little Logan boy, all my fears, worries and disappointments disappeared.

We are only nine months into this crazy ride, but Logan is more like a typical baby than he is different. He eats, sleeps, poops, and plays. He gets fussy and cries when he's hungry. We've dealt with very common baby issues like reflux and constipation. And as for his appearance, he does have characteristics of a person with Down syndrome, but he also looks very much like us. He has my husband's big blue eyes and long eyelashes. He has my fair skin and expressive face. Some days he looks just like our nieces and nephews and siblings.

Logan may take a little longer to reach certain milestones, but he does eventually conquer them. And those moments are even sweeter when he does because it's clear how much harder he has to work to achieve those milestones.

I will share that it's not all rainbows and sunshine. Every week, we have physical therapy and occupational therapy sessions to give him the best shot at hitting his developmental milestones. We have doctors' appointments and medical tests to ensure he remains a healthy, thriving child. We are more cautious about changes to his usual pleasant demeanor because seeing potential medical issues at every turn is part of the journey now. And sometimes, it's all overwhelming. But one look at Logan, and the overwhelm doesn't matter.

I have no idea what his strengths or opportunities will be as he gets older, but I know that I am all in. I will be his biggest cheerleader and help will achieve whatever goals he sets. I will advocate for him in any way I can because his life matters, and he deserves to be treated with kindness, love, and respect regardless of his genetic composition.

I truly believe Logan was brought into our lives to teach us how to be kinder, more patient, and more accepting. Down syndrome was not represented in our family, but now our nieces, nephews, and friends' children will all get to grow up knowing a person with Down syndrome and be better people for it. Logan has changed our world in so many ways and he doesn't even know it.

If I could go back to my past self and tell her one thing, I would say: "Stop robbing your present joy by worrying about your future life. It will all be okay. The love you will have for your child will outweigh all your fears. He will change your life in so many amazing ways. You will be filled with joy and pride every single day just by looking at him".

A Canceled Baby Shower and Isolation During Pregnancy

Today was supposed to be my baby shower. But due to Covid19, we had to cancel as so many other expectant mamas have had to do. And I could be sad about today. About missing out on such a special milestone in my first and possibly only pregnancy. But instead, I am choosing to be grateful, happy, and optimistic.

I'm grateful myself, my baby, my husband, and our family and friends are all healthy and at least physically unaffected by this virus. My fingers and toes are crossed, that remains the case. I'm grateful to be blessed with so many wonderful friends and family who have sent or dropped off gifts even though the shower was canceled weeks ago.

I'm happy it's a beautiful day here today, sunny and warm, which is my favorite kind of weather. And I'm so glad I have the whole day free to soak in all this sun while reading a book and writing this post.

And I'm optimistic this time we are living through, literally history in the making shall pass eventually. My experiences during this pregnancy have been far from what I initially expected. However, in many ways, it's been just what I expected and also even better than I expected.

Why Be Sad When You Could Be Glad

No, I won't have beautiful memories and pictures of getting together with friends and family to celebrate our little boy before his arrival. But I was planning on having pizza, hoagies, and an ice cream bar at the shower. With a recent diagnosis of gestational diabetes, I wouldn't have been able to partake in all that yummy food. So instead, we're hoping to have a "Meet the Baby" get together after his arrival. And hopefully, then I'll be able to eat all the pizza and ice cream I want.

And no, my husband currently can't accompany me to any of the prenatal appointments I've had over the last few weeks. But with his work schedule, I don't think he would have been able to attend those appointments anyway. We've found other ways to keep him connected to this pregnancy and our little one. I immediately send ultrasound photos or videos. I fill him in on what he missed: if the baby was cooperative or uncooperative, an update on his development, growth and the progression of the pregnancy, and my thoughts and feelings regarding the appointment. He also reads books at bedtime, touches my belly when little man is going crazy, and has helped set up the nursery. He's about as connected and involved with this pregnancy and our son as I'd expect him to be regardless of the current situation.

And no, I may not be able to have my doula in the room with us while I give birth (that one is still a possibility, so I'm going to hold out hope) or have visitors at the hospital afterward. BUT it's incredible what this pandemic has created in regards to virtual connection. My doula can be there via IPad or phone to offer suggestions for pain management and walk my husband through the best ways to be supportive. She can also provide her opinion regarding how our pregnancy is progressing. It's been helpful to know ahead of time she may only be there virtually. I have done more research on what I can do to create a calm and positive atmosphere and how to be a self-advocate for the labor I'm hoping to endure.

I've had the time to practice breathing techniques and put together a few labor playlists to listen to during the various stages of labor. I've created a vision board with prompts to remind me to relax my body, breathe slowly and deeply, and to trust that my body knows what it's doing. I'm performing daily exercises and holding postures that are said to help progress labor. And I'm quizzing my husband on my birth plan as much as I can, so hopefully, some of it will stick with him. Long story short, I'm a person that likes to be prepared and having a heads up that I might have to do this solo (or at least without a doula), I'm taking the time to prepare mentally, physically, and emotionally.

And as far as visitors after his arrival, I have no clue how my childbirth experience will be. I can plan as much as I want, but until it's over and he's here, I'm not sure what physical or emotional state I'll be in after labor. Knowing people aren't waiting to swarm in to offer congratulations and to paw my brand new baby is kind of refreshing and peaceful. Sorry to any family reading this. I love you all and know you are super excited to meet him, but the idea of not having to "entertain" anyone for the first few days sounds appealing. I'm sure many people feel the opposite. But I know myself and while I may be begging for the help after his arrival, right now I like the idea of our little family riding the newborn wave solo for the first two or three days. After that, bring all the help!! LOL.

What to Expect When You're Expecting...

This period of my pregnancy is also going exactly as anticipated in many ways. My body is growing and changing every day. Some days I wake up feeling great, and other days I am uncomfortable from the minute I open my eyes. Some nights I sleep soundly and other nights I'm awake every hour having to pee or attempting to readjust my position to get comfortable.

Some days I feel almost light on my feet, and other days I know I'm waddling like Donald Duck. There have been moments that just for a second, I forget I'm pregnant until I catch myself in the mirror and see my bulging belly. Some days my mood and temperament are even and typical. Other days I feel certifiable. I can cry watching a sitcom or become enraged over a simple request to laminate an extra sheet of paper. I can have mood swings that give my husband whiplash.

And there are doctors' appointments, lots of them during this time. Even if some of them are via telemedicine, I still have to be at every single one. There was one week, not too long ago, when I had five appointments in three days! And I don't see the telemedicine visits as missing out on pregnancy milestones, I see them as peace of mind. I'm sure if there were concerns, my doctors wouldn't hesitate to bring me in more often. The fact I have telemedicine visits lets me know things are progressing as they should.

Can I Get an AMEN!!!

There are many things I could be bummed about, there are also many things I'm jazzed about. I have time to prepare for this baby. Not having obligations on the weekend gives me time to set up and organize the nursery. To wash all the clothing, bedding, blankets I've received. And to declutter the house to make room for baby items. I can pamper myself with a nice long bath, a pedicure (even though it's getting really hard to reach my toes), or a mid-day nap. I can read all the books I purchased to prepare for childbirth and postpartum and infant care. That in itself is pretty sweet.

I've also been working from home for the last eight weeks, which will hopefully continue until close to my due date. During this time, I don't have to wear pants!!!! Can I get a hallelujah from all the pregnant ladies?! I get to sleep in. I can take a nap on my lunch break if needed. I can switch out loads of laundry throughout the day, so I don't have to do it when I come home. I can prep dinner on a break, so it's ready to go once I clock out for the day.

Working from home in the last part of pregnancy has been glorious!! I wake up, get a workout in, maybe shower, maybe not and roll up to my desk in leggings and a t-shirt that I may or may not have slept in. And it doesn't matter because no one, except my husband, will see me. My skin feels great because I've been sans makeup for weeks, so no need to scrub and rub my face at night. My hair is still looking good because I'm not torturing it with a curling iron or flat iron on the daily. Hell, if I wash my hair twice a week, that's an accomplishment. I have free time to do the things that matter like workout and meditate or cook a healthy meal since I don't have to get "presentable" and commute to an office.

This will also make the transition from pregnancy to maternity leave a little easier. I get to go from working from home during a time of isolation to staying home during maternity leave with periods of isolation. I know for some mamas, it's tough to transition from social interactions every day to being at home full time mostly alone.

I get to spend all day with my cats, which I know they appreciate. I know my time to cuddle and baby them will be limited once little man is on the scene so I’m soaking it in now. My husband is working from home too, so we eat lunch together every day, during breaks we check-in to see how each others' days are going. When work is over for the day, we can put on our sneakers and go for a walk. We don't have to wait for the other to get home or stop and make dinner first. We look out the window, and if it's decent out, we go for a walk. This time I have to connect with the person and animals I love the most is so precious, and I don't take a single minute of it for granted.

Now, sure I miss my co-worker, seeing my nieces and family and having dinner dates with friends, but those things all still happen just different now. We can zoom, have driveway/porch check-ins, or have social distance coffee chats in the front yard. It's different, but it's doable.

I guess it helps that my husband and I are more homebodies and less social butterflies, but I'm loving the quarantine life most days. I'm trying to use this time wisely and set myself up for survival once the baby comes. Now, this doesn't mean there aren't things I'm bummed about.

FOMO for Real!

I was really looking forward to a pregnancy massage or two. I hear prenatal massages feel amazing!! I wanted to have a few chiropractic appointments to adjust my hip alignment and ease any backaches. I expected to be able to browse racks of infant clothes and purchase a few outfits, books, and toys that were just from me.

I wish I would have taken a prenatal yoga class before all this started. I've done a few online, but taking a class would have also allowed me to connect with other expectant mothers in my area. I planned to pamper myself every few weeks with gel manicures and spa pedicures while I sat in the chair and relished in the alone time. I purchased Groupon tickets to go to a float spa with my husband. Feeling weightless while pregnant must feel incredible. And I’m missing out on all the attention and adoration that comes from strangers and co-workers when you are pregnant.

But, if I let myself think about all the milestones I'm missing out on, I could really put myself into a funk. So instead, I'm looking for things to be grateful for during this isolating time: being outdoors, feeling the sun on my face, and the wiggles of a very active baby in my belly. And I'm choosing to be happy!

What are you missing out on while in quarantine? What are you loving about this time?

First and Second Trimester Pregnancy Essentials

Holy Moly! I'm less than one week away from my third trimester. How and when did that happen?! As I head into my third trimester, I put together a list of the products I loved and still love using from my first and second trimesters.

First Trimester

I was pretty lucky in my first trimester. My only symptoms were sore, sensitive, and growing breasts, pregnancy bloat, and exhaustion. I had waves of nausea if I overate, but never had "morning sickness" and never came close to vomiting.

Sore and All of the Sudden Ginormous

To help with my sore and growing boobs, I wasted no time getting some larger wireless bras. Ones I could wear to bed, to work and to work out in (which by the way, I didn't work out almost at all my first trimester. I was much too tired).

Am I Showing Already? - Nope That's Just Pregnancy Bloat

I didn't listen to my co-worker soon enough when she told me not to wait to buy some maternity pants. I tried the hair tie trick with some of my regular jeans, but was still uncomfortable most of the day. I finally gave in around week 7-8 and purchased some maternity jeans and leggings. I wish I wouldn't have waited so long. The leggings were terrific! I wore them every weekend and most nights to bed.

The leggings were from Motherhood Maternity. I got eight pairs on clearance since the stores near me were going out of business. My maternity jeans I got from Target. I tried the "Under the Bump" and "Over the Bump" and hands down prefer the "Over the Bump" options. The "Under the Bump" styles were low cut, and I prefer my ass to be covered when I sit down. Ain't no one want to see my thong peeking out the back of my pants. So "Over the Bump" it was! And even 20 weeks later, then fit me perfectly and have stretched to accommodate my growing baby.

Other clothing items I purchased early in my pregnancy were maternity t-shirts, tank tops, and over-sized sweaters. For the t-shirts and tanks, I mostly shopped the maternity sections. I got a few great options from the Isabel Maternity by Ingrid & Isabel line at Target. They don't have ruching on the sides and stretched with your growing bump. I sized up in a few vintage Universal Thread t-shirts and A New Day long-sleeved t-shirts. Both are from Target and both are still staples in my wardrobe now at 27 weeks. For sweaters, I decided I could get away with sizing up to a medium or large, especially since it was winter. We all like to be cozy in the winter.

You're Napping AGAIN?!

I heard the first trimester usually comes with exhaustion, but was not prepared for just how tired I would be. Even after eight-plus hours of uninterrupted sleep, I was ready to put my head down at work only two hours later. When I'd get home, I'd curl up on the couch and crash for thirty minutes. And I was ready to call it a night around 9:00 pm.

I remember my husband coming home from work, and seeing me napping said, "You're napping again?!" Yes, I am napping again. There is sorcery happening in my body, and I'm fucking tired! It also didn't' help that the whole first month of my pregnancy, we were renovating our bathroom. So on top of working, I also had to come home and be somewhat helpful to my husband while he cut and measured and installed various materials.

A few things that helped my napping game (which BTW, I am not a normal napper. At least I wasn't pre-pregnancy. I am now.) was a sleep mask and a white noise machine. Both things are part of my regular sleep routine but came in handy when it was still light outside, and my husband was watching tv in the living room. Oh, and coffee. And yes, I still drank 1-2 cups of coffee a day.

What's Happening in my Body and What Size Fruit or Vegetable is my Adorable baby Now?

My other go tos during my first trimester and items I’ve continued to use during my pregnancy are pregnancy related apps and a journal. I started keeping a journal/planner/to-list a few years ago. I found it helpful during this pregnancy to write down any symptoms I was having, concerns or questions for my doctor appointments, pregnancy milestones, and all the thoughts and feelings I was having about this pregnancy. When I review my journal entries at the end of the month, it is enjoyable to read about his first kicks, when my energy came back and when my belly measurement increased by two inches in only three weeks. I can’t wait to share these memories with him when he is older or to refer back to if we have more children.

I almost immediately downloaded The Bump and Babycenter apps. I love knowing what size/weight baby is each week, what to expect as my body changes or all the various decisions to think through about labor and postpartum. I don't always look at these apps daily, but I do go into them weekly.

Second Trimester

The week or so before I hit my second trimester, my boobs started hurting less, bloat turned into an actual baby bump, and my energy returned, which was much appreciated. I started working out again since I did very little during my first trimester. I got back into using my fitness app and taking walks around our neighborhood. However, with the fun of announcing our pregnancy, other symptoms started popping up. Along came the start of uncomfortable sleeping, acid reflux and the dreaded heartburn, and a belly that is very much in the way now when it comes to bending over.

You Want Me to Sleep How?

I'm usually a back sleeper, so reading all the articles and warnings about how it's safer to sleep on your side during the last half of your pregnancy, put a damper on my quality sleep. I could fall asleep on my side but always ended up on my back. Now that my uterus was growing and heavier, sleeping on my back meant my limbs were pins and needles after only an hour or two. And I worried about harming the baby by crushing my vena cava (apparently some really important vein) while sleeping on my back. Also, it just became less comfortable to sleep on my back.

I know most people swear by a full-body pregnancy pillow to help with side sleeping due to the addition of a new belly. So I tried one out but hated it. Pre-pregnancy, I already slept with quite a few pillows to support my neck and hip alignment. Trying to add the body-sized pillow into the mix just didn’t work. Luckily, I found a smaller pregnancy wedge to add in with all my other sleep assistance pillows. And it's been amazing! Not only do I use it when I sleep on my side, but I also use it under my side/back when I inevitably roll onto my back at some point in the night. That wedge keeps me propped up just enough, so my limbs don't fall asleep and gives me some peace of mind that I'm not suffocating my baby by crushing that vein. Irrational fears, I know. I loved this wedge so much that I ordered a second one. So now I have one on either side of me so I can switch sides easily and always have one close to my back. The cost of both pillows combined is only $30, which is much cheaper than a fancy U-shaped or C-shaped full body option.

It Burns, There's a Lump in My Throat, and Do I Have COVID-19?

Spoiler Alert! I do not have the Coronavirus. At least not yet, and hopefully not at all. But I do have acid reflux, and it's uncomfortable. I've had acid reflux before very mildly and very randomly. And usually, it was more of burping and a dry cough. But now my symptoms also include heartburn and the feeling of a lump in my throat, usually around bedtime. The culprits, I’ve deduced, are coffee, chocolate, spicy or saucy foods, onion, and garlic, all my favorite things to consume. How can you have pizza or Italian food without sauce, onion, and garlic?? It's a good thing I ate plenty of chocolate and drank tons of coffee during the first 20ish weeks of pregnancy because as soon as I hit week twenty-one, the fun was over.

Coffee wasn't as hard to limit as I thought it would be. It helped that my energy was back, and I was only drinking one cup about four days a week. I easily made the switch to green tea instead. And now that I have gestational diabetes (more on that in a future post) and working from home with limited access to candy, it wasn't hard to forgo the chocolate either. But especially now that I was self-quarantining and had gestational diabetes and am making all my meals from scratch, how the heck was I going to make yummy, healthier meals without garlic, onions, and tomatoes? The truth is, I can't. I try my best not to put as much of those things into recipes, but at the end of the day, the acid reflux and heartburn are much less now that coffee and chocolate are out of my diet, so taking some TUMS or ginger tea usually does the trick. Also, having an adjustable bed is a godsend for acid reflux. It quiets my dry cough, which is generally worse at night and lets gravity help with the acid and my digestion.

If you don't have an adjustable bed, I highly suggest you get one, especially if you have any sort of asthma or bronchial spasms or lower back pain or acid reflux. We purchased ours before all this pregnancy business since I also have bronchial spasms from about November - March when the weather is either turning or cold. My husband and I opted for a split mattress model so I can elevate while he sleeps flat. I can relieve some of my symptoms, and he isn't kept awake by my hacking cough.

It Can't Possibly Stretch Anymore, Please Tie My Shoes, and It's Sooo Heavy

Once I hit my second trimester, I started growing, and it hasn't stopped. The most noticeable growth happened between weeks 20 - 23. My belly circumference increased two inches in just three weeks. Starting around week twenty, it was like I could FEEEL the skin around my mid-section stretching. And there was much less room in my midsection. I would have to sit up straighter to make room for internal organs or lay on the couch instead of sitting while watching tv.

And my skin was getting tighter. One thing I started doing early on, maybe around weeks twelve or thirteen is lotioning up my mid-section. It feels so good to rub oil and lotion on your tight, itchy expanding belly. And so far, it's doing the trick. No signs of stretch marks yet (even though I’m sure they are coming). And even though I know stretch marks have more to do with genetics than a self-care routine, I'll choose to believe me rubbing oil on my bump two or three times a day is helping. And anyway, it feels so good.

I also noticed somewhere around weeks 20-23 that it was harder to bend over to put on my sneakers. The dress code in my small office is pretty casual, so usually, I wear running shoes to work. There was one morning I remember trying to put my shoes on and tie them, and it was so uncomfortable. I tried sitting down to do it, and that was almost worst. I asked my husband to tie my sneakers, and he laughed at me and said, "No." I think he thought I was dramatic at the time, but I was so annoyed he wouldn't do me a solid.

So I went scouring the place to find everything, a.k.a. Amazon, and came across a wonderful invention called Hickies. They are plastic things that go into the lace holes of your shoes. You can configure them to make shoes looser or tighter, but the best part is there is no tying of laces. Once you have them adjusted to your liking, you just slip your feet in and be on your way. I tried one pair to see if I liked them and then purchased a second pair for my indoor workout shoes. Take that, hubby! Don't need you no mo'.

Again around this magical time of weeks 20-23, I realized walking was becoming uncomfortable instead of relaxing. My belly would tighten if I walked too fast. I already felt like I was walking at the pace of a snail, and I wasn't sure I could walk much slower. I also started getting an achy feeling in my pelvis. During one of my walks, my belly started to tighten, but I was determined to keep walking. So I put my hands under my belly and lifted it for the remainder of my walk. . By the time I got back, my arms felt like they had a workout. I knew I had gained weight, but I didn't realize how much that belly contributed to the pounds.

Thankfully, during one of my many trips to Motherhood Maternity in the early stages of my pregnancy, I purchased a belly support band. I wasn't sure at the time I would ever use it or need it, but it was a reasonable price, so I figured better safe than sorry. And I'm happy I purchased it. It wasn't until a week or two ago that I remembered I had it. I was skeptical it would work, but to my surprise, it has helped when I go on walks. I no longer have contractions that last the entire walk, and my pelvis doesn't hurt. Since walking seems to be the only way I can get out for some fresh air these days that support belt has become a lifesaver.

Drinking ALL the Water and Preparing for Labor

A few other honorable mentions from my second trimester. The first is my ginormous water bottle. It's a 64-ounce beast that has measurements and time reminders to drink all the water. Staying hydrated has helped me stave off leg cramps, swelling, caffeine headaches from giving up coffee, and I'm pretty sure it has also helped my stretching skin. I purchased one for work and then quickly bought another to keep at home. I try to drink between 80-100 oz of water a day, and this water bottle keeps me hitting that target. I take one with me everywhere and have had multiple compliments and questions. I heard about it from a YouTuber I watch, Olivia Zapo. If you are pregnant or a new mama, go check out her channel. I've purchased quite a few things from watching her videos (pregnancy and non-pregnancy) and haven't been disappointed yet.

The second is the Birth Hour podcast. Now that I'm on the other side of this pregnancy, I've become obsessed with labor stories. I stumbled across this podcast and enjoy listening to an episode here and there. There are a ton of episodes, so I usually go through and pick one that has an interesting title or seems relevant to how I think I want to labor. Most episodes are an hour or less, and it's so interesting to hear how each birth is so different. I've come away with some useful resources, book recommendations, and some yes's and no ways for my own birth plan. Definitely worth checking out if you enjoy listening to podcasts and are pregnant or a mom.

My last second trimester essential is YouTube. When my energy came back around week thirteen, I knew I wanted to get back into working out. The fitness app I was using pre-pregnancy had a few prenatal workouts, but I quickly become bored of the same ten routines. So I searched YouTube, and there are so many free prenatal workout videos available, from yoga and stretching to strength training to barre and pilates. It's helped me stay motivated to workout and has plenty of options depending on what I'm feeling that day.

I also still use all the clothes, apps, and journal I used in my first trimester and will continue to use them, plus the items mentioned from my second trimester, into my third trimester.

For all my pregnant/new mamas or seasoned mamas, what essentials do you swear by for pregnancy?